Thoughts on Promotion...

[RBL_Vapor]

I had duty the other night when some clown got the hairbrained idea of sneaking in the XO's office after taps and plugging his laptop into her internet port.

I was standing in the Drill Instructor hut across deck when she came looking for me (she was also the Officer of the Day). She wanted to know if I, being duty and senior Marine on deck, had noticed that someone had gone in her office.
I said no. She was clearly aggrivated. I would have been too. It was a stupid thing to do. But it made me come to realize a lot since the promotion.

First of all is how people tend to act differently around you. Whether its to kiss up or to accuse of hypocrisy, people just don't treat you the same when you're higher rank. Not here anyway.

And you know. I haven't changed at all--As a person or what I expect out of everyone else. I still say the same things I said before. My attitude hasnt changed. At least thats what my friends say.

Second of all is how everyone expects more from you. Responsibility I guess. Territorially it makes sense but, last week I was just another Marine on deck. And I could roam and do anything I wanted without having to come back to everyone's problems.

To do the right thing essentially alienates me from the rest of my peers, when I'd rather just chill out with them. The others in charge tell me all the time to stop working with everyone else to get jobs done, because Im supposed to be in charge. But it just doesnt feel natural to be on the outside just cause I have a billet. I'm sure you all (who are older) have faced this one before. How does one walk the wire between being a boss and a buddy?

RBL_Vapor
Sean A. Layne
Lcpl,  USMC

[M1A2Tanker]

To be honest, as a Lance Corporal, you're not too much different from your buddies.  It's when you get into the junior NCO ranks that things get a little complicated. 

But as you noticed, you're picking up on folks treating you a little different due to the rank.  Basically to walk the wire, you have to know when to cut in with the responsibility, and help others realize they shouldn't do some thing in a respectful manner, and when to just kick back. 

Always do the right thing though.  Integrity and honor means a lot to a person, at least I believe.  As well it should.  If you are doing the right thing and someone is trying to do something that is incredibly wrong and your buddies get on your case...then they are trying to turn the guilt of their actions on you.  It would show a lack of integrity on their part, not yours.  And it wouldn't be kissing up to the higher ranks at all. 

[Snoopy]

If it's any help, you'll find it's a similar situation in the business world.  When you start out, your usually on 1 of the lower level jobs within a company and your friends tend to be others of a similar level.  As you advance within the company, your responsibilities tend to increase, often resulting in you being accountable for people that report to you. (the big jump in business is when you go from unionized worker , to management) The higher up you go, the more people your resposible for.
  Of course, with increased responsibility, there are costs.  You start to stand out from the other workers you previously considered your friends and buddies, whereas before you blended in. People below you tend to look up to you for leadership and guidance. Infractions that you used to chuckle about are no longer funny, because your now responsible to deal with them. A person (it escapes me at the moment who it was) once said "It's lonely at the top" and there's alot of truth to that.  You'll find that your friends list will change as you move up. You'll no longer fit in with the 'old' crowd and you'll tend to associate and be most comfortable, with others of a similar level.
  It gets trickiest, when family members are involved. The most difficult circumstance I've ever had to deal with was being my own father's boss (I was my mother's boss for a time too, but that wasn't NEARLY as difficult to deal with). We had to seperate work life from family life to deal with it. Business's, and the military too if I'm not mistaken, tend to frown and try to avoid such situations.  It's not easy to avoid favoring,or being seen as favoring, another family member.  You have to be very honest and straightforward when working with them, and they ,in turn have to realize that you have a job to do and support you.
  This is starting to ramble a bit, so I'll bring this to an end. I hope it's of some use to you.  Do your best, maintain your integrety , use your best judgement and you should be fine.  If your friends or buddies don't understand that(and most WILL understand), realize that friends lists do change and accept it as a part of life.*S*

[Azis]

Well said fellas,
Sounds like a bit of a crossroad Vapor. Not everyone is meant for or well suited for leadership roles. I think people who are meant for those roles have a need or desire for the responsibility, respect and challenge of leadership. Enough so that that desire may have to replace the comrodery that once seemed more important. There are good and bad leaders, and there are also good and bad followers. I think you will find that those who value your frienship, will be understanding and supportive as long as you are fair and obviously trying to accomplish your goal. Others may not be so tolerant, and therefore may not be worthy of your friendship. Not to worry, for life is so full of new encounters, remember them in a good way and go on.

GL Bro
Az